


to find your way back home

by orphan_account



Category: Glee
Genre: Fate, M/M, One Night Stands, References to Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-28
Updated: 2012-10-28
Packaged: 2017-11-17 05:07:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/547938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Later (later when he’s drunk and it’s Thanksgiving dinner at the Anderson house, way after that night), he’d tell Cooper it wasn’t planned.</p>
            </blockquote>





	to find your way back home

**Author's Note:**

> Rating is for suicidal thoughts and intentions, one-night-stands, awkward step-family relationships, graphic description intercourse between two adults the age of consent, sappy belief in destiny. written for the 30-day writing challenge: companion.

Later  _(later when he’s drunk and it’s Thanksgiving dinner at the Anderson house, way after that night)_ , he’d tell Cooper it wasn’t planned.

The truth is he never planned it for that night, never decided when that would happen, but he still spent time, all his spare time, imagining how that would go – always in vague terms, always with ‘what if’s, but always the same story, always the same way to go.

Nothing particular happens that day: it’s just a regular Friday like every other one for a fucking decade, maybe Sebastian has been feeling a tag more cranky than usual, maybe he didn’t have enough coffee that morning or it was the lousy grade at a math exam and the snarky comments from his classmates that did it.

Maybe the regular Friday, the routine day after day in buttfuck nowhere, Ohio, was what did it in the end.

The fact remains that Sebastian gets in his car and gets out of town, the tank half-empty already and not planning to go any farther, any longer than the car will.

He makes himself believe he didn’t plan it because that sounds too melodramatic, even for Sebastian ‘just give me a chance’ fucking Smythe himself.

.

He doesn’t go that far. It turns out he’s got petrol for an hour, maybe an hour and a half more when he runs out of cigarettes, and the way his hands are shaking maybe he needs that if he wants to go all the way with his plan.

He has alcohol in the backseat, sure, but he doesn’t want to crash his car and end up looking like an amateur, where’s the class in that. What he has in mind will look… deliberate. Wanted. An exit stage left, clean cut and precise, no letting it look like an accident.

So he stops at the next station, grabs the rest of his money. He has enough left for a coffee and a pack of cigarettes, and that’s where it stops to go according to plan.

.

He decided he’ll smoke the first one out there, leaning on the bridge railing and freezing to his bones. He figures the view is worth five wasted minutes – it’s not anything spectacular, but it’s not like he’ll ever be there to witness it again.

Turns out Sebastian’s a nostalgic, cheesy little fuck when he wants to.

Turns out the universe has other plans for him when a stranger leans up next to him and asks him for a lighter. And he looks so worn out, so fresh out of hope, so  _similar_  to Sebastian he has to stop and stare.

He’s older, the whole stubble, dark hair, blue eyes thing quite appealing. And when he offers, Sebastian just can’t say no.

Is there a more appropriate way to go for him anyway (he thinks with a smirk)? _I met the love of my life on the highway to hell._

It’s not a very good joke, but they’re scrambling inside the car, on the backseat, and Sebastian’s leaning up to turn the seat warmers on, trying to ignore the man’s laugh, and he figures that’s as good as he’s going to do for the moment.

.

It’s not rough, or anything like any sex Sebastian has had – and he’s had a lot. They both need this, no urgency but still rough touches, no kissing, and no tenderness. Sebastian for once is happy to just bend over and take it, his face buried is his arms, hands grabbing onto the seat to keep his head from banging on the door with every deliberate, slow thrust forward.

The burn lasts for a while, latex pushing and pulling inside of him with almost no preparation, the way he likes it. At least he’s not worried about morning-after soreness.

He’s louder than he would if he was being honest, but it feels good to fake it. The man’s fingers push hard on the skin, the bone of his shoulders, kneading at the muscle. He’s so much bigger than Sebastian, in every sense of the term, like every part of that body was just made to dominate Sebastian, to bend him over and fuck him like that.

That’s not Sebastian’s usual thing, but  _Jesus_  does he enjoy it. He pushes back, close and eager for release, the rhythm of it all getting faster, more desperate as the man seems to tip closer to the edge with Sebastian too.

In the end Sebastian comes over the man’s hand like a thirteen-year-old, quickly and gasping for breath after a messy hand job. He reaches forward to lick the hand clean, self-conscious of the blue-eyed gaze on him, skin against skin still hot and prickling, and if he smiles at the stranger it’s only just his way to thank him for a good fuck, still high and come-stupid.

He lets him stay in, because the car is big and because he’s aware seat warmers aren’t something everyone can afford, and it’s freezing outside so it’s the least he can do.

It’s when he worries about being late for Saturday family lunch that he has to admit he’s given up on his little plan, at least this time.

.

They wake up at dawn and Sebastian kicks the other off his car, with a tired, sad excuse for a smile and what’s left of the beer they’d shared. He drives back slowly, more than enough time to think of an excuse, a confused story about a friend with car trouble. He’ll explain to his mom with plenty of eye-rolling and exaggerated hand gestures, and a smile to himself over an in-joke about seat warmers.

That’s the last time he thinks of it until he meets Cooper at a dinner over at Blaine’s, and both pretend not to remember, both pretend to be strangers, but still something in their eyes reminds them of the time they were both lost and losing.

That’s the last time he thinks of it until he’s sitting next to Blaine at their engagement party, their fingers laced together, and Cooper’s making a speech, and he’s mentioning how it could have gone differently. Their eyes meet and for a second Sebastian is absolutely sure that’s it, he’s going to tell everything, the tale of how he slept with his soon-to-be brother-in-law in the backseat of a car all those years ago.

But he doesn’t.

Maybe someday, when they’re older, Sebastian gets to tell Blaine that story like something funny, something neither life-changing nor important, just a bump along the ride.

Maybe someday, he gets to tell Blaine the story of how his brother, Cooper Anderson, saved his life with a one-night-stand, but that sounds way too melodramatic, even for Sebastian ‘fucking propose to me already’ Smythe.


End file.
